Feminism Is For Everyone

Apr 27, 2008,1:45 AM

crow's feet, double chins, and other female-specific "medical issues"

I've been attacked by this idea from a wide variety of sources lately that crow's feet (the little wrinkles next to your eyes you get when you're older) are the bane of every aging woman's existence...which is something I just DON'T UNDERSTAND. I LOVE these wrinkles! To me they represent happy lives, in which the imperfectly sculpted person has spent the majority of their time smiling (and thus pinching the skin next to their eyes). I'm less thrilled about the huge frown lines which are already dividing up my face, but I don't understand why it is that smiling wrinkles are something to be despised?

So I went on a search for a website to illustrate my point (that society generally hates wrinkles...on women's faces), and I stumbled upon this little gem...

According to this book, (linked from www.mothernature.com, which promises "Natural Products. Healthy Advice") Crow's Feet are caused by too much smoking and sun exposure, double chins by too much food and sun exposure again (to fix, just try this always-healthy plan: "Cut the amount of food that you put on your plate in half, for example."), and "saggy breasts" by breastfeeding, gravity, sun exposure again (in other words, caused by LIVING). [You should combat saggy breasts til the bitter end by wearing a bra as often as possible.]

Other pressing issues addressed by these women DOCTORS in the book are "bad hair days" and "baggy knees" ("Who wants to walk around looking as though the skin around your knees is one size too big, saggy and wrinkled like an elephant instead of smooth and taut like a French dinner roll? Yet as years pass, the skin over your knees can start to look like it needs a face-lift.")

And yet, the book bills itself to be "The first self-care book for women based exclusively on advice from women doctors. This book is at the forefront of a revolution in medical care-heightened demand for women physicians by consumers..."

Wait, it's really pretending to be about female empowerment? In this great new day and age, you can fix your baggy knees and cellulite, because you should never ever have these "issues"/you should never grow up.

Whatever happened to old and wise? Respected elder? Now we want our grandma's getting boob jobs and face-lifts, to look like they're 18? We want our moms to look like they're just getting out of college? Shouldn't your body reflect the life you've lived? The experiences which have shaped you and molded you?